There are many more monkey themed objects in my life than there were five years ago.
“Me time” is the time between dropping off Alice at school and driving to the office.
Spending money on toys is stupid because a roll of toilet paper, markers, glue, glitter and lip gloss are so much more fun.
Nothing is funnier than when your four year old calls you a “butt crack”
Nothing is more infuriating than when your four year old calls you a “butt crack”
The debate about working moms and “having it all” pisses me off. “Having it all” includes being stressed, stretched, messy, successful, happy, sad, disappointed, unkept, put together. Stop diagraming motherhood mamas! It’s a screwed up institution and you are making it so much worse with this debate. I get the conflict. I live it. We all chose it.
Tutus make every outfit fancy
Baby cheeks make everything feel better
Date nights are expensive but are money well spent
Heaven doesn’t exist but if it does, it’s Saturday morning in bed with my family watching Peter Pan for the 300th time
Nothing is better than when the kids go to Grandma’s house.
When the kids go to Grandma’s house all I can do is talk about them
I will never look as good as I did when I was 25, but it has never mattered less
The words “mommy come here for a minute” can mean that there is macaroni and cheese all over the carpet or that your kid just learned how to spell your name
I am always in motion.
My kids are always in motion
Sleep. Mmmm sleep
